Blearily I woke up this morning, before Kevin’s alarm went off, and discovered a baby nestled between he and I. He normally sleeps very well in his own bed, assuming we let him play in bed with the light on for a while. So how could this have come to be?
I’ll tell you how: mind control.Â
Throughout this small child’s short life, he’s been growing his powers of mind control. First, it started innocuously. I ‘knew’ when he was hungry. Then, it became more sinister: I’d find myself drifting over to his playpen in the middle of another task and picking him up. As soon as I picked him up, he’d orient himself forward, ready for his mecha to drive him around. “How did I end up holding this baby?” I’d ask Kevin. “I have things to do.”
“Mind control,” he’d say.
And then, last night! I have only the vaguest memory of waking up and bringing him from his bed to ours. Did he cry? Or did I just dream it? Whatever it was, he was very, very happy snuggled between us.
In other news, we’ve cracked the mind-controlling baby/English language barrier in a way quite significant: we can now understand ‘bottle’. His word for it barely resembles the word we know, but it is consistent. He’s been getting a lot more bottles lately, as a result. See what language can do for you, superbaby?!?
He can also point out his diaper, which is kind of awesome because I’ve made no real effort to teach him that word, unlike ‘hair’, ‘book’, ‘eyes’, ‘mouth’, ‘nose’, ‘foot’ and ‘hand’. He gets ‘hair’ and ‘ears’ confused, like he was getting ‘no’ and ‘nose’ for a while. (There are few things as frustratingly funny as telling a baby ‘No!’ and having him touch your nose before going back to doing what he was doing.)
I love watching him stare at me when I ask him something, and then make a real effort to decode what I’m saying. I think he might enjoy the puzzle, too, although not nearly as much as 1.) throwing things on the floor 2.) bottles 3.) being carried around 4.) music 5.) BeJeweled 6.) WoW 7.) His bead toy 8.) Petting Dante 9.) Being pushed in his stroller 10.) Crawling down open indoor spaces. But, you know, up there.