Starting a few days ago– maybe around when Angie arrived? The slats that support my IKEA mattress fell out of their frame. Angie reassembled it for me. Today? Yesterday? The day before? It happened again. This morning, it happened when I was laying on the bed. Boomf I fell. 7 AM. Kevin groggily reassembled for me. It happened five minutes later. Kevin reassembled. It happened twenty minutes later. I decided to reassemble on my own. But I could not sleep because I was afraid if relaxed it would go boom.
Raymond took a look at it and declared the slats old and decrepit. Angie and I went out and amidst other shopping, bought a new set of slats. We came home. She assembled. I made the bed and lay down.
It promptly fell in. I shrieked.
We poked at the frame and Angie noticed the metal rail that supported the slat bent some, and was missing a screw. I provided a screw I’d found on the carpet under the bed this morning. She screwed it in.
I made the bed. After some moments of internal debate, I summoned my courage and I laid myself down.
The bed fell in again.
Now I am being clever. I am lying down on a different bed. Half the bed is covered with antique laundry but it is better than an amazingly crooked bed spilling me into the bedframe.